I’ll poem-ponder about it instead
It’s all very primal
Except for when it isn’t.
It’s all based on instinct
Except for the stuff that isn’t.
It’s all about love and communication
Except for when it isn’t, AT ALL.
It’s about what you want
Except for all the stuff you don’t want that you ended up loving.
But only that one time
Ahh, maybe it’s a now and forever thing.
Never mind, I hate that.
Am I a cat?
No, I’m not independent enough.
I love shit that I thought I hated
I hate shit that I thought I loved
None of it was my decision
I thought maybe love would be more like an engine
And touch was gas, injecting passion in each direction
But now, I feel it’s eternal grace.
The warmth of love’s blaze,
turned to sunshine on my face.
And it has given me comfort, direction
And loads of indecision.
If I knew who I was, then maybe I’d be able to make a gander
At what I like, what feels good, and which way I like to gamble.
I haven’t the slightest clue, who I am
But I can’t wait to ask about you.
I’m a lost-loner-loser
Feeling empty, confused and chosen
For a life lived alone, and uncertain.
I am steadfast in my love, and my choices
My thumb is green, everything will come up roses.
But Jesus Christ I could sure use a Moses
To part the sea of thoughts that composes
A requiem of insanity pouring through my veins
My thoughts gone from left to right,
All I’ve known for sure is that I’ve got to try
To understand everything
Forever. All of it.
I’ve got to try.
I will crack this code.
I’ll probably die,
But people die skydiving
What a pointless way to go
At least I’ll die overthinking
Isn’t that somewhat more honorable than fucking skydiving
Jesus H.C. Y’all.