Worry Wart Wanders Willingly into Wormhole

I’m a worrier.

And a bit of a warrior.

I’m best at fretting,

betting on disaster

Planning on piss-all.

I’m cautious, meticulous

Heavy planning with a lust for passion,

Always looking for some heavier petting.

Worrying gives me control.

I anticipated that!

That’s how I roll.

If I claim I saw it coming, then I don’t get upset.

I know my worst traits,

You don’t have to tell me.

You can point out my basic flaws

It won’t unsettle me,

I’m way ahead of you honey.

There isn’t anything new anyone could chuck

I’m just like all the others you’ve labeled as

USDA b label, Taco Bell gourmet shitfuck.

I used to worry I was doing everything

Incorrectly. But now I understand

That you’re all wrong, and all this worrying

Has got me sprung.

I guess this is anxiety.

This is my response to being more of

What they told me to be.

I used to worry I wasn’t enough,

Now I worry I’m not even me.

Haha, whatever. I’ll shrug it off, act tough

As if love wasn’t rough enough

I’ve got to wrestle myself to the ground

She won’t submit and he won’t sit down

The best part about being an anxious fuck

Is the joyous and masturbatory nature

Of all this eternal worry.


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