Weed vs. Nicotine—and Other Arguments I Want To Feature On My Gravestone

Sometimes I think tobacco/nicotine

Smokers/vapers

Are the dumbest people alive

And then I realize

That if someone told me

That weed is killing me

I’d pile my bowl–

Twice as high.

I wouldn’t give a single shit

True–

Part of the appeal of cannabis

Is that I’m very convinced

It’s harmless

And helpful

And none of the

Reefer madness nonsense bullshit

Still–

If I suddenly became

Allergic to weed

I’d want my gravestone to read

“He died with his true love

In his mouth, relieving every

Ache in his body and his mind–

Cannabis is the only thing

I found in this world

That made life worth living”

End poem

Dates should say

1990’sish–whenever

Also it should say

“Stop smoking cigs you fucking troll”

And then just like

A list of recommended favorite strains

Hopefully a family tree

Of genetics I brought into the world

You know, the most important things

About me

Like how I think weed is

Dope, and that people should

Stop drinking, quit smoking

And take up weed


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