The Life of the Party

When I am with people

I am the life of the party

It’s my disguise

I usually hate them

I get really stressed out

I get offended and I

Try to leave before I

Get too surly.

I get home

Nice and early like I thought

I had planned to, but somehow

Then–

Exactly then

Not before, when I was surrounded by bodies

But after, when I’ve freed myself–

I feel lonely.

—————–

It’s almost as if

God has a sense of humor

Or something

Maybe it’s just me

Laughing by myself

Alone at home

Where I’m always

The life of the party

—————

Or maybe

I’m just putting on a show

For someone who hates theater

Waiting for my chance to shine

My light fully, but too scared

To take off my clothes.

Maybe I’m just a coward–

Defeated by my own ambition,

My own anxiety

Or maybe

I’m right and

That’s why everyone is

Already laughing at me

I guess this is why

I’m the life of the party

You’re only alive if you’ve been

Dead already


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