Virgin

Shit got so real

Totally against my will

I thought I was doing well

But I guess I wasn’t telling

Anyone what I was really feeling

I guess I was living

A sort of fantasy?

When I close my eyes to daydream

I’m usually faced with nightmares.

I toss and turn and

Mumble-scream.

I’ve been living a fantasy

Because otherwise I’d be quivering

Dead and silenced crying out to

No one, caring about everyone

Cursed to be cognizant

I’ve got strategies, now

I’ve drowned them out

Now I just have melodies

Quivering whispering

Torturous repetition

Breaking the mold with

Trepidation. I wonder if you aren’t

My soul, from another life

Torn to pieces by two bodies

I know you feel my

Conscience tapping

Scratching and pleading

For understanding. I wish I knew

What I was dealing with

I thought I loved myself

The way I wanted to be loved

But knowing you proved

I was a virgin

 

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