Non-Binary and Not-Having-It

I get it

Being trans is fine

Some people need to change

But I don’t really identify

With the narrative

Of “trans euphoria”

Or the idea that I am

Ecstatically changing and

Loving every second

Of my journey and

Who I am —

I am

Mad about it

Honest to god, sincerely

Pissed. I am not

Euphoric, I am not

Wallowing either —

I am simply being honest

Upfront and blunt

The way people have been to me

The way I that understand

Strong people are to be.

I am strong, I am trans

And I am still fucking pissed as hell

I don’t feel the need

To apologize for the way I feel

I understand that anger kills

But perhaps I am supposed to be a

Martyr for myself

I am not bitter, I am not

Vengeful, I am not

Jealous or insecure–

I am furious

Daily reminders

Of how to be enraged

The society

You all built

To me, is a cage

No matter which way

They say I am, I am

Not comfortable here

And I can’t stay still

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